Monday, 10 September 2012

daughters -in- law=family

Having three sons, I would have been expected to dislike at least one of the girls they brought home and married, but I have been pleasantly really surprised. My eldest son, is now happily married for a second time, but even during his first marriage I think I was able to be a good ma- in -law without much interference and only visited when I was asked. As we did live a distance away, it was not too hard to keep that promise.

Now of course he has moved to Australia, and that's a whole different idea of distance.. However we do still speak on the phone, and also text like mad, so I don't feel too cut off from his world.

My second son has married another beauty... [all my boys seem to attract gorgeous young women*]- and they  have now been married almost 5 years, their anniversary will be next month. Over the time that she has known us, she has become such an integral part of the family. She bakes like a real cook, she makes things for the home and knits and crochets.. there is no end to her talents and she also works full time whilst my son, her husband completes his PhD in Architecture.. What a woman.!!
I love her for her kindness and intelligence and knowing how happy she makes my boy..

I love Daniel's wife in Australia for the same qualities, and she has given Daniel another son, and is a wonderful home maker as well as being a career girl.. Both these girls are kind to me and I think  they like me enough not to have any problems with me..  I do often  think how lucky my boys are, but then if they were not worthy of them, the girls would never have agreed to marry them..

Its a funny thing to think about when sons bring home the girls that are going to be their wives. They are joining the family and hopefully going to produce the next generation to carry the name forward.  When my daughters married, they joined their husbands' families to carry on their family name.

I know this makes me sound old fashioned, but it is true and luckily both my girls found good people who married them and were good fathers afterwards too.

For me, the only difference in loving daughters in law and my own daughters is that I carried my daughters and saw them grow up, and my new daughters I did not...
My love for all my family is there, but not over played and I think they all respect that. I promised myself that I would be there to hear them, to help them when I could, and always smile and have fun with them, and so far, touch wood it has worked out..

In truth, I don't only have two daughters, more like 4, and I still waiting for the youngest of my brood to bring his wife to be home to meet us.

Meanwhile I know it will soon be the  time when my daughters in law are producing babies, and that gives me even more to be proud of and fills my heart with  such joy [and impatience] as I wait to meet the next  new members of our ever growing family.


  1. What a treasure this is for you, watching this next generation unfold.

    Mothers-in-law can be hard on a new wife, trust me, I know from experience. I nicknamed mine "the crusher" as she seemed determined to crush my spirit. But you sound like the right kind. Loving and respectful. And I'm pretty sure that your daughters-in-law are grateful to you for having raised such good men for them to love :)

    1. Bless your heart Liv. I was quite lucky with the first mother in law I had, she kept her own counsel, but advised me when I needed it, the second was a real dragon who I found quite difficult to like, but I perservered, and in the end I looked after her as she lived next door to us and had dementia in her final years. All my life I tried to treat people as I would like to be treated, and so far its worked out!

  2. It is wonderful to have a good loving caring relationship with your daughters in law... you say you are lucky to have them and I am certain that they are just as lucky, if not more, to have you as their mother in law.

  3. Jeannine, what a lovely post! I am so happy you are my mother in law and I too count you as family.
    Our relationship means so much to me- you are not only a great friend but are someone we can both turn to whenever we need you and that is something I never expected from my ma-in-law. You are a very special lady, your loving kindness and everything you do for us, means so much.
    I know you are impatient for babies (me too) but we won't keep you waiting too much longer, just got to get uni out of the way first xxx

  4. What a beautiful post. I think it is so important to be a good Mother-In-Law as well as a Daughter-In-Law. I want a great relationship with my DIL someday. I agree, they will be family. I love reading your post. They have such emotions in them. Thank you.

    I left a little something in my post for you today. Nothing big and if you do not want to participate, no hurt feelings.

  5. Oh for a mother-in-law like you! I tried to turn the other cheek, and kept on smiling, but in the end I gave up!