house

house

Tuesday 2 June 2015

Not going home again.

I guess it was around their seventies that my parents started attending funeral services all over England and France for their dear friends who had died before them. I remember them saying how hard and depressing it was to see their friends leave them, and that they were all good people and should have lived longer. This evening, I picked up the phone to listen to my message on the answer machine. It was another school friend telling me that our friend had died this morning from a massive heart attack. WE had all known each other since we were ten years old. She was always the peacemaker and kind person.. never got into rows or fights and always had time to listen. She never grew taller than almost 5 ft, so we called her 'Little Mary'..She moved to live in Spain a while ago, and finally after working giving fishermen weekend holidays away, where she would give the breakfasts and her husband would take them fishing in the rivers around their house in Spain, they had retired and were starting to enjoy life... She has always had a bit of Angina, but like me, nothing really to worry about, only rarely needing the puffer... BUT over the last few months had noticed difficulty in swallowing and then eating food. Of course it was a Tumour on her throat, and she had to have an operation which took place a week ago today. Accordingly she seemed to come out of the 8 hour operation with all the signs being good, and was looking forward to coming back to their house by the end of this week. However, early this morning, she had a massive heart attack, and they were unable to save her. When I had called her house this morning, her son, over from his home in England answered the phone and to my enquiry, said he would prefer it if his dad could ring me back... Alarm signals ran through me, and I called another close schoolfriend that Jamie had been very emotional and I was worried.. She rang another friend who rang the husband and we all found out that our little mary had gone to join the Angels earlier this morning.. I knew that Jamie was upset, but never in a million years did I think it could be because she had died! Our lives when you look at them , only endure for a few years, too few to mention, it seems just as you think you have the 'hang of it' it all goes pearshaped! They were so happy in their life out there together, and were so looking forward to many more years enjoying their times together in the sunshine. Now her husband will have to arrange her funeral, what a terrible sad thing to have to do, and really now, seventy is almost expected to be younger than it ever was!! It is true, I feel she was cheated of many more years with her family. She met her husband whilst still at school and they married as soon as she reached 18, so that life time together will be hard to replace with being alone and single again. He will have the love of his son and his family, but how empty it will all feel. I am sitting here thinking who's turn will it be next? You never can tell, that is why I told my kids never to waste time, its gone so quickly and this life certainly is no rehearsal...... this is it, one chance to get it as right as you can whilst you are here and not to hurt anyone on the way... to treat everyone as you wanted to be treated... so far, so good...

5 comments:

  1. I am sorry for the loss of your friend Mary. My heart goes out to her husband especially as this is going to be quite the adjustment. It is not something you get used to. You miss your spouse daily, the raw grief does lessen however.

    FlowerLady

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  2. I am so sorry you have lost your little mary, so sad, and unexpected!

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  3. I am sorry for the loss of your Little Mary. How sad and sudden (((HUGS)))

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  4. Oh dear, so sorry for your loss - and to her family of course.
    xx

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  5. I am in the same situation like you ! I lost my best friend in England we had met in Tenerife in 1998 where she slipped on the tiles of the swimming pool and landed on my lap. It turned out that she and her husband came from London and lived very close to my son's house. So we met often spent Christmas and New Years together and then I visited them each year in Eastbourne since 2007. They were supposed to come over to Belgium in July, when her husband called me last week that she has passed away suddenly from inner bleeding. She was only 67 ! I still can't believe it. I had spoken with her just a few days before. It will take me some time to get over it !

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