Yesterday was Mother's Day in England. After a short heavy downpour, the sun came out and wiped all the grass raindrops away leaving the grass as freshly green as if just painted in an art book. We were waiting for Rebecca,my eldest daughter,to arrive at the house and then we were going to walk over the road to the restaurant to have lunch. It had to be at the first sitting, and she was driving from Oxford. As the trip takes two hours I was a little nervous that she might be late... But she was bang on time...
Lovely to see her and to sit by the window watching the sun shine and happy talk all around us. We had a great meal and then came back to the house where we sat around and talked some more. With both her elder children living away from home now, and Ben the youngest away with his Dad, it was so neat to have her near me to share the Mothering Sunday with me.
My first Mothers Day was after Daniel was born. He was born on March 1st and I was so happy to be included that year as a first time mother.. I loved getting the cards and being made a fuss of.. bliss to me.. All my children wherever they are will text or ring me or send cards, so its a day when they all fuss me and that's lovely.
On a more serious note though.. another friend told me that she thought every day should be a mother's day , not just one day in the year where you make a fuss... .. which I think is right.. it should not just be applied because its a special day, but because you love your mother all of the time!
I am not going to pontificate here as I know that some parents are extremely hard to get along with.. And with the best will in the world, some people just cannot get on with their parents.. That is sad and a loss to both sides.. I did have a bit of a fraught time with my mother as I approached my teen years, I started having great mood swings, and took against any advice she had to offer.. I would get into arguments with her and talk in an Italian accent.. a la loren!!
God only knows why it had to be Italian[ we had no italian relatives!!!!!.. and would stomp off .. I would hear her saying to my brother,' leave her alone, she's having a hard time, its her hormones'***
My darling mother put up with all sorts of silliness from me.. Walking down the road, I would be swinging my hips if we passed workmen to have them comment on my walk... what my mother thought I cannot imagine. I thought I was being very sexy without realising the difficulties that that could have been caused by my actions.. I am sure my mother would have wanted to slap me to stop, but she let me get on with it and only corrected me when my silliness went too far..
I can remember when I was 13 I developed a blush at every word men or boys spoke to me.. When we had a French student stay with us, I hung around him watching him closely and wiggling my hips and everything else just so he would notice me.. I can clearly remember my mother saying to my father ' she is flirting with Gerard now!! '
Mothers have a lot to put up with and parenting is such a minefield to step through, trying to guide the young ones without depressing their spirits or energy and to advise and warn against dangers that were out in the big world.. Of course rarely did I listen, and innocence, thank goodness, saved me in one or two spots, where looking back, I had inadvisedly placed myself in possible danger..
We sailed through though, and then it was my turn with my boys and girls.. I made the best fist of it as I could ,and they somehow came through, but not without some very very hairy moments I can tell you!!
So, having my darling daughter share with me this special day yesterday made all the late nights waiting for one of them or other to come home, all the days wandering how they were doing, the scraped knees and childhood injuries to be dealt with , the tooth pulling and the myriad things that being a parent means you have to do, so worthwhile .
Sharing Mother's Day together with her, made yesterday a very special day for us both*.